TEARS

 

I used to cry often, alone in my room listening to music.

Then I stopped.

 

I refuse to stop feeling.

One doesn’t have to cry to feel deeply.

 

Sure, I’ve been hurt by love.

Haven’t we all?

 

On second thought,

can Love hurt anyone?

 

Surely not!

No more than roses can make you nauseous.

 

I don’t understand Love.
Does anybody?

 

Still, shouldn’t we at least try?

Talk less and feel more.

 

I notice a solitary woman in the corner of the cafe.

I see loneliness in her eyes.

 

She’s wondering if she’ll ever meet a man

who understands her heart.

 

How can I know this?

She could be thinking of a thousand other things.

 

Still I know, call it Intuition.

It is second nature to me sometimes.

 

I look again.

She smiles shyly.

 

I wonder if I imagined the smile.

She looks at me.

 

I approach her.

We look at each other in silence.

 

I touch her hand gently,

then say, “I come here on Fridays.

 

Hope to see you again.
”You seem like a sensitive man,” she says.

 

On the way out I wipe my cheek.
I have cried and it feels good.

 

 

 

THE MESSENGER OF LOVE

 

Late one night the air was still.

I heard your voice, and saw your face in my dreams.

You beckoned me outside.

 

I went to my favorite oak tree and sat beneath his trunk.

I took a few deep breaths and closed my eyes.

When I opened them a few minutes later, you were here.

 

“Who are you?” I asked in tears.
“Why do you come to me?”

 

Long golden hair.

Sparkling eyes so filled with love.

Your aura of white fills me with hope.

It warms my chilled heart and melts my fears.

 

“Listen,” you said softly.
“I have a message for you.
You long for love.

You have tried to buy love which cannot be bought.

Heed the words that I say.

 

“Do not chase Love!

Be loving and you will attract Her to you.

Before you can have that which you desire,

you must give it freely.”

 

“I have given to others.

Is this not true?

I help people whenever I can.”

 

“This is true, but have you asked yourself why you give?

You give to receive.

You do nothing without expecting something in return.

 

It is better to give a penny with a pure heart

than a diamond out of pride.

I come to you because in dreams you asked for me.”

 

“How will this happen?” I asked the pure One

who visited me beside the oak tree.

 

“You will forget yourself and think of others.

You will consider their needs first.

When you do you shall be fulfilled.

Your heart shall no longer feel empty.

 

In learning the lesson to freely give,

expecting nothing in return, all shall be yours

for you shall be love.

This paradox is true!

 

Anytime you feel discouraged or alone inside,

someone is in need of love.

Reach out to another.

Extend a helping hand.

When you embrace another, you embrace yourself.”

 

“Your words are wise.

Your thoughts are deep.

I shall do as you say.

I shall freely give to others,

and more so when I am sad.

This much of your message I do understand.”

 

“You understand well, gentle soul.

I shall answer your question of who I am.

I am the Messenger of Love!

 

 

 

LOVE, TAKE ME WHERE YOU WANT ME TO GO

 

Too often we try to understand the ways of the Heart.

Sort out our feelings with our reasoning minds.

But Love like a bird flies freely where she will.

When you reach to grasp her, she leaves you behind.

 

Why I yearn for you I cannot explain.

Is it possible you could feel this way for me?

Can two souls ever truly know Happiness together?

From aching human longings can we ever be free?

 

Perhaps there are no answers to such questions.

Perhaps it is futile to run from Cupid’s darts.

Surrender and learn what we can everyday.
Even when it seems Love is ripping our soul apart.

 

I think upon you and I tremble all over.

Can our minds and hearts merge I do not know.

I do believe there is room for both Joy and Sorrow.

Love, take me where you want me to go.

 

12/11/2001

 

 

 

MEETING

 

Two strangers bump into each other in the bar.

“Pardon me,” the blond man says to the brunette young lady,

making no effort to step back.

 

“Nice touch,” the lady says, winking in the dark.
“You have a nice bump.  Not aggressive.”

The man smiles, his hard calloused hand

extending itself.

 

She shakes it gently, looks into his eyes

then turns her eyes away.

“Would you like a drink, miss?”

 

“I’d prefer your heart,” she says so softly the man

has to lean closer to hear her.

“You weird or something,” he asks, frowning.

 

“No.  I just know you are ready to give your heart away.”

“How do you know?”

I can’t explain it, but I feel things about people sometimes.”

“It’s good to feel,” the man replies.

 

“Yes,” the lady replies, “hearts never shut down

completely or we’d be dead.”

“Maybe so.”

 

The lady places her hand over the man’s heart and knocks gently.

“Yes, still a lot of heart in there yet,” she says, smiling.

She reaches into her purse and takes out a business card.

“Give me a call soon if you’d like.”

She gently touches his cheek then briskly walks away.

 

The man blinks several times, wondering if the lady

was a mirage or fantasy.

He has had so many.

They are safe.

He folds the card in half then slides it into his tight blue jean back pocket.

He pats his heart and smiles all the way to his car.

 

 

 

LISTENING

 

Do you need me to listen to you?

I will do so willingly, and ask for nothing in return.

We’re total strangers at this party, and yet

I feel compelled to hear your story.

The story you want to tell, need to tell.

 

Am I being too bold?

No.

I haven’t approached you yet.

I’m having this conversation in my head.

I’m mentally asking your permission to approach you.

 

Too many people impose themselves on us with selfish intentions.

I would never do this to you.

You do not deserve this.

No one does.

 

I make a trip to the rest room and tell myself that

if you are still here when I return I will introduce myself.

 

I return a few minutes later.

You are still here.

Alone.
And needing to tell your story.

I walk past you, smile, and walk on.

 

Though I do not look back,

I can feel that your eyes are glued to me.

I can feel them.

 

They are powerful, and pleading with me to come back.

I slowly backtrack my steps and stop a few feet away from you.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t keep going,” you say.

“I’d like to talk to you.

“Thanks,” I say, blushing, not knowing why.

We order a drink, sit down and I listen.

 

 

 

MY DEAREST TRUE LOVE

 

If your soul did not touch mine.

I would not tingle through and through.

The loving glow in your eyes I see

in my mind when I think of you.

 

The distance which separates us

is soon to lose its hold.

This new love I give thanks for, my Treasure.

Far more precious than silver or gold.

 

I do not believe in coincidences.

It was not by chance that we met.

Destiny brought you to me, my sweet one.

Though you are far, still I have no regrets.

 

Each day I feel your presence.

At night your spirit draws close to me.

We embrace and in our oneness

we behold marvels few mortals ever see.

 

The Moon, the Stars, and the Angels

wink and smile upon us from above.

In joyous anticipation I await our first visit.

My sweet Friend, my dearest true Love!

 

 

 

LOVE MAY STAY

 

It is time to share.

Life is asking this of me.

Time for my heart to open.

Time for this hard shell to break.

 

I once loved

with body, mind, and soul.

So in love was I.

Life was full of magic, and mystery.

Through Love’s eyes all was bright and clear.

 

One day she left and moved away.

My life was shattered and crushed.

A familiar story told many times

of broken hearts that never beat the same again.

 

With the advent of autumn, Love’s

old intensity is stirring up.

Inside me, deep inside me feelings are

gushing up that I thought had died.

 

I smell Love in the crisp cool air.

It’s everywhere I turn.

I would run to the end of the earth,

but I know Love would meet me there.

 

Go away I want to scream.

I vowed never again or yearn or cry.

It is time to change, I hear Love say

in my art, my heart, and in my dreams.

 

I have the choice to shove Love aside.

I could numb myself through drink, TV and sleep.

But Love’s gentle voice would reach me somehow.

From Love I cannot escape or hide.

 

I know not to struggle when Love comes for me.

She is Life needing to merge with herself.

I inhale the crisp air beneath a Sycamore tree,

and say maybe this Time Love will stay.

 

 

 

SILENT JOY

 

The music won’t stop

even when I turn it off.

The songs of the heart fill my mind.

Dizziness is taking hold of me.

 

It has been so long since I wanted to hear them.

I thought my sad heart had forgotten every word.

Now I am playing them everyday and singing

as dreams of love and romance once more carry me away.

 

After a few days a realization dawns upon me.

It is Love who is beckoning me.

I am preparing myself for a change from

the solitary life that I lead.

 

Such strong love stirrings are awakening my heart.

I sense my Beloved’s presence; she is somehow nigh.

Our spirits are touching and joining in dreams

at night and during visions during the day.

 

A jolt of fear fills me with sudden terror.

I have been alone so very long.

How will I know what to do, how to act?

I don’t know if it’s in me to love again.

 

Isn’t once enough to lose one’s hopes and dreams?

Can’t I forget the sorrowful days of unrequited love?

I look at the trees and sky and plead for help.

Nature always soothes my confusion and pain.

 

My shaking subsides when I sit beneath a Pine tree.

His windblown branches reach out and comfort me.

The breeze caresses my hair and kisses my cheek.

 

I close my eyes.
The songs begin anew

This time I am so filled with silent joy that I cry.

 

 

 

OPEN YOUR HEART’S DOOR

 

Your glistening eyes see deep into my soul.

I am lost in your childlike, radiant, glow.

When I first beheld your merry, graceful dance,

I knew that our meeting was not by chance.

 

I was swept away in a magical dream

where appearances are not what they seem.

The young can be old; the old can be young.

There celestial airs unheard by mortals are sung.

 

Fiery passionate yearnings I sensed in you,

and knew that dreams really do come true.

Your sweet lyrical voice was music to my soul.

Filled me wonder, magic, making my heart overflow.

 

Take me to the land where beauty never disappears.

Romance never fades, Love is crystal clear.

Where passion and wonder like the ocean never run dry.

Where your Beloved shines brighter than the starlit sky.

 

Let yourself by Cupid be transported away

to the Elysian Fields where the gods and Muses play.

By crystal golden fountains stands your Beloved so true.

A flower fully blossomed extending herself to you.

 

Believe and the gods will give you another chance

to be in love again; to taste the fruits of romance.

Time to look past doubt, hesitation and fear.

Drink Ecstasy’s sweetness; be filled with joyous tears.

 

The days pass quickly but the moment is nigh.

The way to know Love is to give it a try.

Surrender to the intoxicating force of your heart.

It’s the same force that births music, and art.

 

You cannot control Love nor give it a name.

But you can let Love transport you far beyond shame.

When this monumental passion knocks as it has before.

All you must do is open your heart’s door.

 

 

 

EARLY ARRIVAL

 

I decide to go to a bar for a change.

I look around and glance at the faces.

What do I see?

Not much really.
People don’t show you who they are.

They don’t want to.

 

Would I want to know them anyway?

Do men go to bars to see who women are?

Do they go to look them over, compare them to

their last lover, their latest conquest?


To look for someone they loved a long time ago?

Someone they still love in their fantasies.

Someone who might even look out at them

from someone else’s eyes.

 

Some say life is a dream.

A dark haired woman looks in my direction.
She looks real enough.

I wonder when was the last time she felt passion, intensity, wonder?

I could smile at her and mentally invite her to come sit near me.

I’m good at reading people when I’m close to them.

 

They say more by their silence and eye contact

than with words and gestures.

But I don’t go.

I’m too hesitant.

Not in the mood to take the initiative.

 

I sit quietly a few more moments, sipping my coke.

I look back at the dark eyed woman.

She is gone.

Wouldn’t you know it?

Another ship in the night has sailed on

because I looked the other way, and hesitated too long.

 

It’s still early I tell myself.

I can sit back and take in the vibes, slowly warm up.

No need to rush.

These people aren’t going anywhere.

At least not as far as I can tell.

 

They are lonely too.

That is why they came here.

People begin to chatter and mingle in between

puffs of smoke and sips of drinks.

 

More men and women enter the bar.

I like that.

I am in the mood to see lots of people tonight.

 

I relax more, hoping someone will talk to me

before the night is over.

I smile and take a big breath then sigh,

knowing it will happen.

It always does when I will it so.